Power can be a loaded word. For many women, it conjures images of dominance, control, and manipulation; traits we’ve been conditioned to avoid. But here’s the truth: power is neither inherently good nor bad. It is simply the ability to influence, create impact, and make decisions that align with our values. And in today’s world, particularly in leadership, claiming your power is not just a personal decision, it’s a critical action that shapes the organisations and communities we are part of.
Globally women are under-represented as leaders in organisations and politics. According to Forbes this unequal representation impacts families, workplaces and society and costs the global economy $7 trillion annually.1
This blog explores our ambiguous relationship with power, why understanding it is important and how to claim it. Whether you’re a woman navigating the complexities of modern organizations or a leader seeking to foster a more inclusive workplace, this guide will provide insights and actionable steps to help you embrace your power and leverage it for personal and professional growth.
Understanding Power: Redefining the Narrative
At its core, power is the ability to do something or act in a particular way. It’s not necessarily about dominating others or exerting control, it’s about having the capacity to influence outcomes, guide decisions, and create meaningful impact.
For some women, stepping into power can feel daunting. Socialised to be likeable, humble, and compliant, many women struggle with the traditional leadership models that prize assertiveness, confidence, and dominance. This conditioning makes it difficult to claim leadership roles or assert power in environments that often prioritise male-centric leadership traits.
But here’s the paradox: powerlessness is one of the most debilitating human experiences, and avoiding power can cost us dearly. Whether it’s the frustration of feeling invisible or the missed opportunities that arise from not asserting ourselves, failing to claim our power doesn’t just affect us, it also impacts the organisations and systems we operate within.
Power doesn’t have to equal control; it can equal influence, impact, and authenticity. When we move away from traditional notions of power, we free ourselves to lead on our own terms, in a way that aligns with our values.is is hard, but I know I’ll get through it.’
Types of Power: Sources and How They Influence Leadership
Understanding the various sources of power can help some women navigate organisational dynamics and confidently claim their space in leadership.
- Formal Power
Formal power comes from one’s role, title or place within a structure or system.
Positional Power: This is power granted by the organisation based on one’s role like a CEO or a manager. It’s the power derived from your position in the hierarchy and the formal authority that comes with it. The impact of positional power depends on how it is used, whether you empower others or control them.
Control Based Power: This type of power relies on the ability to force or compel others to act based on leverage. Often, it’s seen in systems where resources, like budgets or information, are controlled by certain individuals or groups, allowing them to dictate outcomes.
Informational Power comes from having access to valuable knowledge or insights that others need. Those who hold this power can influence decisions by sharing (or not sharing) key information.
- Personal Power
Personal power is internal. It comes from who you are and your ability to influence through your character and personal qualities.
Expertise: This power is rooted in credibility from your knowledge, skills, or experience. Being sought after for your expertise makes you valuable in the eyes of others, and people tend to listen and follow you because of what you know.
Presence-based power comes from the trust and respect you inspire. It’s the ability to influence others because people believe in you. This kind of power isn’t necessarily loud or aggressive; it’s the quiet confidence that naturally attracts followers.
Power Within: Self-trust, confidence and a sense of personal agency contribute to this type of power. Knowing your worth and being able to back yourself gives you the strength to step into leadership roles and make bold decisions. This power is grounded in self-awareness and belief in your abilities.
- Collective Power
Collective power is derived from collaboration and relationships. It comes from working with others to achieve common goals, often leading to greater influence and impact.
Network / Relational Power: This form of power is built on connections. Who you know and how well you relate to others can open doors and create opportunities for influence.
Power With (Inclusive Power): This type of power emphasises collaborative influence. Rather than dominating others, this power focuses on shared goals and consensus something that resonates with many women because it aligns with the values of inclusion, empathy, and collective impact. One of our favourite authors, Brene Brown, talks eloquently about the difference between power over and power with2. This distinction is useful, as it informs how we choose to engage with power.
Why Power Can Be Complicated for Women & What Gets in the Way of Women Standing in Their Authentic Power
Negative Associations with Power
For many women, the word “power” carries negative associations, often linked to dominance, control, and selfishness. These associations are shaped by societal expectations and the way power is typically wielded by those in authority, often in aggressive or domineering ways. This makes it difficult for women to relate to power without feeling uncomfortable or disconnected from it.
- Fear of Backlash
When women assert themselves or step into their power, they risk being seen as “too much,” “aggressive,” or “difficult.” The potential backlash and cost of this visibility feels high, with the fear of being isolated, judged, or excluded from key conversations and opportunities, too great a risk. This fear leads to the belief that it’s safer to remain invisible or behind the scenes than to claim a leadership role, even when you know you have the capability to lead.
- Perfectionism and Over-Preparation
Fear of backlash can feed into perfectionism and the need to over-prepare in order to avoid judgement, mistakes or embarrassment. This mindset is time consuming, slows down progress and prevents women from taking action or sharing their ideas, ultimately limiting their impact.
- Cultural Conditioning and Gender Expectations
Cultural conditioning also plays a significant role in keeping women from embracing their full power. From a young age, women are taught to be likable, humble, and collaborative, but these traits can feel counterproductive when it comes to standing in one’s power. Women are often told to lead, but not too boldly, to be confident, but not intimidating. This creates a razor-thin line for women to navigate, where asserting their power can feel like crossing an invisible boundary.
- Lack of Diverse Role Models
The lack of diverse role models further complicates this issue. Women in leadership, particularly those in positions of authority, are often judged more harshly than their male counterparts. For example, female political leaders like Julia Gillard, who was seen as tough and unrelenting or Jacinda Ardern, who demonstrated power through empathy and kindness, were both criticised and scrutinised in ways that male leaders were not. This lack of diverse role models leads to a narrow view of power, which makes it difficult for women to envision themselves leading in ways that feel authentic.
- Systemic Pressure and Invisible Barriers
Ultimately, the pressure for women to conform to a traditional, masculine model of leadership creates a barrier to claiming their power. Overcoming this requires courage and internal strength, as well as a recognition that authentic power can look and feel different for every woman.
The Cost of Playing Small: Why You Can’t Afford to Shrink
Many women are comfortable empowering others, but struggle with empowering themselves. The habit of “playing small” becomes ingrained when stepping into power feels risky or uncomfortable. However, playing small is not a neutral stance. It is a choice with long-term consequences, affecting personal growth, professional opportunities, and even the systems we operate within.
Personally: The Internal Struggle
The cost of playing small starts internally. It manifests in self-doubt, second-guessing your decisions, over-apologising, and minimising your achievements. Mental exhaustion sets in as you constantly analyse “what if” scenarios, questioning your worth. The time and energy spent reflecting, assessing, and doubting could be better spent advancing your personal goals. Over time, this undermines your confidence and erodes your sense of self-worth.
This internal struggle can lead to burnout. Many women take on too much responsibility without recognition, feeling invisible despite their hard work. In extreme cases, women find themselves stepping back from leadership opportunities, choosing roles that are beneath their capabilities simply because it feels easier and safer.
A critical consequence of playing small personally is the lack of impact. When you don’t claim your power, you can’t advocate for what matters to you, your team, the cause you’re championing or the organisation.
Professionally: Career Stagnation and Missed Opportunities
On the professional front, the repercussions are just as significant. Playing small leads to career stagnation. You may be passed over for promotions, not because you lack the capability, but because others don’t see you as confident enough to lead. Confidence (and competence) gaps widen when women shy away from claiming their power.
Consider the analogy of two individuals vying for the same leadership role. One person takes the position, ‘I’m not ready yet, it’s not the right time,’ while the other takes the risk and steps in. Twelve months later, the person who took the leap has gained valuable experience, built stronger relationships with stakeholders, and deepened their influence in the organisation. This person has advanced their skills and capabilities, putting them on a faster track to career progression. Meanwhile, the person who played small likely finds themselves stagnating. Over time, this results in fewer promotions, lower remuneration and a continued gender pay gap. The financial impact is immense, with women often earning less because they haven’t found a way to feel comfortable stepping into their power.
Systemically: Perpetuating the Status Quo
On a systemic level, the costs of not claiming power are just as profound. When women shy away from leadership, it allows the status quo to continue, a system still dominated by a singular, often masculine leadership style. This perpetuates inequity in the workplace, where the perspectives of marginalised groups are ignored. Fewer women in leadership roles means less diverse thinking, and fewer opportunities for innovation and change.
The lack of diverse role models also contributes to this systemic problem. If young women see only one type of leadership being celebrated, loud, dominant and often male, they may assume that to progress they need to adopt that same leadership style. This narrows their idea of what leadership can look like, reinforcing stereotypes and limiting the full potential of future leaders.
Furthermore, not claiming your power leaves room for less qualified people to fill leadership roles, individuals who may not bring the necessary empathy, integrity, or skill to the table. These “bad actors” perpetuate negative practices, further entrenching the cycle of poor leadership.
Breaking the Cycle: The Importance of Claiming Your Power
Claiming your power is not just about personal growth; it’s about contributing to systemic change. When women step into their power, they not only elevate themselves but also challenge the status quo, offering a more inclusive and diverse vision of leadership.
By stepping up and claiming your space, you send a clear message: leadership can look different. It can be collaborative, inclusive, and empathetic. It can be grounded in authenticity, not ego. The time to step into your power is now, not just for your own benefit, but for the benefit of everyone around you, from colleagues to the systems we all operate in.
Reclaiming Your Power: How to Step into Leadership with Confidence
If you’re ready to claim your power, it’s time to start with some foundational steps that will support lead authentically and with confidence. Here are seven key actions you can take to begin reclaiming your personal power:
- Be Self-Aware, Be Yourself
The first step in reclaiming your power is self-awareness. Know your strengths, values, and blind spots. Self-awareness allows you to lead from an authentic place, grounded in what truly matters to you. As author, Kemi Nekvapil says in her book ‘Power’, cultivating presence is the first step to building power.3
Unpack your beliefs about power: Reflect on your relationship with power. What does power mean to you? Do you have any negative associations, such as seeing power as synonymous with control or manipulation? Recognise where you’ve witnessed power misused and redefine it in a way that feels aligned with your values.
- Leverage Your Physical Power
Power isn’t just a mindset, it’s also a felt experience in the body. Your body plays a significant role in how you experience and project power.
How you stand, breathe, and speak impacts how you project power. When you feel confident, you stand tall and feel energised. Practice intentional body language and use the breath to regulate your nervous system and express your power more effectively.
- Be Aware of Your Power Leaks
Power leaks are subtle behaviours, thoughts, or habits that undermine your confidence and sense of control, like over-apologising or avoiding difficult conversations. Start noticing where your power slips away and take action to plug those leaks. This may involve setting clearer boundaries and practicing self-advocacy.
- Be Clear
To lead with confidence, clarity is essential. Know your purpose and align your actions with your values. Define the type of power you want to hold, whether it’s about influence, presence, or collaboration and then set boundaries that reflect your goals. Clear purpose and boundaries empower you to stay grounded.
- Be Courageous
Courage grows through action. Start small by taking brave steps even when you feel uncomfortable. Advocate for yourself, share your ideas, and own your ambition. Discomfort signals growth, so lean into it, and let your small acts of confidence support you to step into your power.
- Be Collaborative (Not Compliant)
Power doesn’t have to be a solo pursuit. Leadership is about collaboration, not domination. Build relationships, co-create, and elevate others while still claiming your space. Don’t shrink back to maintain peace; seek out opportunities for shared growth and surround yourself with supportive, like-minded individuals
- Be Compassionate and Kind with Yourself
Stepping into power can feel uncomfortable at first. You’re asking yourself to shift your mindset, take risks, and sometimes face challenges head-on. This is where self-compassion is crucial.
Claiming your power involves facing discomfort and taking risks. Be kind to yourself in the process. Start with manageable steps, and don’t expect perfection. Embrace discomfort as part of your growth and treat yourself with the same compassion you’d offer a friend navigating similar challenges.
How Organisations Can Support Women to Claim Their Power
While individual actions are important, organisations play a key role in supporting women to stand in their power. Here’s how leaders and organisations can contribute to this change:
- Make Power Visible
Start a conversation about power within your organisation. Acknowledge the biases that silence women and other underrepresented groups. Measure power by impact, not volume; focus on the contributions and outcomes of individuals rather than the loudest voices.
As part of making power visible, leaders must reflect on whose voices are heard and whose are excluded, particularly in meetings, decision-making processes, and leadership opportunities.
- Foster Psychological Safety
By creating safe spaces where women can express themselves without fear of being penalised, labelled, or sidelined, you will ensure greater participation and contribution. Encourage experimentation, and risk-taking, acknowledging that these actions, not perfection, foster true growth and visibility.
Prioritise mental and physical well-being. Stepping into leadership can be challenging, and without proper rest and self-care, burnout is a real risk. Encourage leaders and team members alike to take breaks and honour their need for recovery. Leaders can model this behaviour, demonstrating that taking time for self-care is not only acceptable but essential for long-term success. Creating a culture of psychological safety means acknowledging the impact of stress and pressure, while allowing space for rest to recharge.
- Invest in Confidence-Building and Visibility
Provide leadership development opportunities that focus on both skills and mindset. Support platforms and initiatives, such as Employee Resource Groups (ERGs), where women can share their expertise, lead projects, and shape culture.
Creating visibility isn’t just about giving women a platform, it’s also about creating supportive systems, being aware of the societal and cultural conditioning that have led to women having less confidence and self-belief. Our Acts of Confidence program prvides a proven methodology that resources women to stand in their power, to advocate for what they want, be seen for their leadership qualities and to set and enforce boundaries. By doing this in community with like-minded professional women, they learn that much of what is holding them back is a shared experience, and with the right tools can be addressed.
- Mentor, Sponsor, and Advocate
It’s not enough to just mentor women; leaders have a role to actively sponsor and advocate for them. Back them publicly, invite their voices into key conversations, and ensure their contributions are recognised. Leaders can also work to interrupt bias in meetings, ensuring that women’s voices are heard and that they are supported in taking leadership roles. This proactive support is essential for women’s progression in organisations, particularly in male-dominated industries.
- Redefine Power and Leadership
Champion ‘power with’ rather than ‘power over’. Celebrate diverse leadership styles, including those that emphasise collaboration, care, and inclusion. Challenge double standards where confidence and strength are praised in men but punished in women.
Encourage diverse leadership styles: Not all power has to be loud and commanding. A truly inclusive leadership culture celebrates quiet power, empathetic leadership, and collaborative approaches. Organisations that support varied leadership styles show that power and influence come in many forms. Recognising and rewarding these diverse styles of leadership not only helps women thrive but also fosters a culture that is more supportive and equitable for everyone.
Final Thoughts: Power Is Not a Zero-Sum Game
Claiming your power is not about taking something away from someone else, it’s about stepping into your potential and creating space for others to do the same. Whether you’re a woman leading within an organisation or a leader working to create a more inclusive and equitable workplace, power is about impact, not domination. By redefining what power means and supporting women in their leadership journey, we can create a future where everyone, regardless of gender, background, or style, can lead with authenticity and confidence.
For more information on how you can support women in your organisation to step into their power with clarity, confidence and influence, reach out at info@quantumimpact.com.au
Our signature, Women in Leadership program, Acts of Confidence resources women with practical tools and strategies that fast-track their development and support a sustainable pipeline of female talent. To get an overview of the program, including ROI, impact and efficacy email us at info@quantumimpact.com.au